Standing and waiting

"Over and above personal problems, there is an objective challenge to over­come inequity, injustice, helplessness, suffering, carelessness, oppression. Over and above the din of desires there is a calling, a demanding, a waiting, an expectation. There is a question that follows me wherever I turn. What is expected of me? What is demanded of me?

What we encounter is not only flowers and stars, mountains and walls. Over and above all things is a sublime expectation, a waiting for. With every child born a new expectation enters the world.

This is the most important experience in the life of every human being: something is asked of me. Every human being has had a moment in which he sensed a mysterious waiting for him. Meaning is found in responding to the demand, meaning is found in sensing the demand."

Abraham Joshua Heschel

I would add that fear and trembling, in the kierkegaardian sense of an existential anxiety, is also found in sensing that demand, more precisely in the gap between that demand and where we usually live our lives: in ignorance of  what our role is in fulfilling the demand and in disconnection from what prompts it. Concerning this the Netivot Shalom writes that "...it is said that his own personal world "stands", on the three things that strengthen a Jew's stand so that he can fulfill his task and purpose in any situation and through this rectify that which pertains to the root of his soul." (http://atailtolions.blogspot.com/2012/09/the-netivot-shalom-on-root-of-ones-soul.html)

First words upon arising

מוֹדֶה (מוֹדָה) אֲנִי לְפָנֶֽיךָ מֶֽלֶךְ חַי וְקַיָּים. שֶׁהֶֽחֱזַֽרְתָּ בִּי נִשְׁמָתִי בְחֶמְלָה. רַבָּה אֱמֽוּנָתֶֽךָ

Modeh (modah) ani lifanekha melekh ḥai v'kayam sheheḥezarta bi nishmahti b'ḥemlah, rabah emunatekha.
I offer thanks before you, living and eternal King, for You have mercifully restored my soul within me; Your faithfulness is great.

"One needs to be careful with one's words...Thus when a person wakens from sleep, he or she is a new being, as the verse states 'renewed every morning.' If one's first words concern non-sacred matters, and all the more so, if one's words are not as they should be, then even if afterwards one prays and studies, all of one's words follow as branches of those first words." (Rabbi Israel ben Eliezer aka the Baal Shem Tov, "Pillar of Prayer" Ch.2 #16)

According to this advice from the Baal Shem Tov, the first middah to practice in the morning is zehirut, vigilance concerning one's speech. One needs to be careful with the words of the modeh/modah ani: weigh them each one by one - which one feels light and strong and lifts me out of bed (which one is heavy and doesn't connect)?
modeh - can I feel grateful this morning? if not move on, because the yetzer will quickly move in to make me feel bad that I can't feel gratitude.
ani - don't read it by itself, but together with what follows: ani lefaneikha - I am never I alone, I am always "I-before-you." Can I feel this now, take it into they day?
melekh chai v'kayam - read it as "that which lives and by living makes alive." Do I feel this making-alive in me as I wake up and start my day? What will I make alive by living today?
sh'echezarta bi nishmati - my soul has been returned to me, do I feel it? now it's a good time to feel the breath in the neshamah, how am I breathing? I pause for a few minutes to focus on how I breathe.
b'chemlah - this brings me back to 'ani lefaneikha', you have given me something not because I deserve it, but out of mercy, how can I bring this into my day today?
rabah emunatekha - full faith in me, this is the first gift as I wake up sitting here in bed without merit yet full of merit.

The Netivot Shalom on the Root of One's Soul

an excerpt from Netivot Shalom on Pirkei Avot on the mishnah "Shimon the Righteous was one of the last survivors of the Great Assembly.  He used to say: On three things the world stands: on the Torah, on the service, and on deeds of loving kindness." 

"This can also be understood by way of divine service: the world stands upon the personal world of each and every person, because each and every person is a microcosm. And as it is taught in "Yesod Ha'avodah"[1] in the name of the Holy Ari, from the day of the creation of the world each and every person has been assigned a certain task to be carried out in accordance to the root of his soul and it is for the rectification of that particular matter that he came down into this world. And it is also written that each and every day since the creation of the world comes with a special task that must be rectified on that very day, so that every person every day is like a special creation and a microcosm.
It is in this context that Shimon the Righteous comes to show how a Jew can make his world stand when confronted with crises in his life in such a way that he may fulfill his task and purpose in his world. The mishnah introduces him as having been "one of  the last survivors of the Great Assembly" in order to say that after the demise of the members of the Great Assembly he came to teach the last generation what possibilities are still open for a Jew to fulfill his task and purpose in the midst of life's turmoil: when dark forces overwhelm him and he is surrounded by troubles, how can he fulfill his task and purpose in his own personal world for which he had come into the world. Concerning this it is said that his own personal world "stands", on the three things that strengthen a Jew's stand so that he can fulfill his task and purpose in any situation and through this rectify that which pertains to the root of his soul.

---

[1] "Yesod Ha'avodah" by Rabbi Avraham Weinberg Alter of Slonim (1804 or 1809 - 1883)

The Netivot Shalom on Pirkei Avot

It was in a mussar class with Rabbi Ira Stone that I first heard about Rabbi Shalom Noach Berezovsky (or Brazovsky) of Slonim's zt"l writings on Pirkei Avot. Subsequently I bought the book, started reading it and wanted to know more about its author and his teachings.

With one exception* Rabbi Shalom Noach Berezovsky's teachings are available only in Hebrew. His main opus is called Netivot Shalom, "Pathways of Peace" and, in the tradition of calling a Rebbe by the title of his main work, its author is also known as "the Netivot Shalom". In its entirety it consists of seven volumes, five devoted to commentaries on the Torah and two containing more general writings on mussar, Torah and holidays. Like most of the other publications by the Mechon Emunah Ve'Daat associated with the Beit Avraham Slonim yeshiva in Jerusalem, these volumes are beautifully produced and a delight to hold in hand, look at and learn from.
The Va'Yikra volume, in addition to the commentaries on the weekly parasha, also contains the Netivot Shalom's schmuessen on selected sayings from the six chapters of Mishnah Pirkei Avot. In his wisdom, the publisher has also made available large photocopied excerpts from the volumes in low cost pamphlet form. "Netivot Shalom on Pirkei Avot" (נתיבות שלום על פרקי אבות) was one of the first such publications, followed by others on Chanukkah, Purim and the Holocaust.

I continued reading the Netivot Shalom on Pirkei Avot in chevruta with someone who has a great love and knowledge of Pirkei Avot: every Shabbat we would devote some time to reading and translating a little. The Hebrew text is not particularly difficult, but one must bear in mind that it is a transcription of the Rabbi's sichot kodesh, "holy talks," delivered  at the seudah shlishit during summer Shabbats**. As such, they display some of the elliptic and repetitious nature that oral teachings tend to have. Although in the beginning these might be a distraction, as one reads on they coalesce into something familiar and become the Rabbi's voice.
As we read on, I started taking notes of what we had translated and ended up with a full translation of the first chapter and parts of some others. Together with my chevruta we brought the translations to an adult class and the translation of the first sicha, on "A person who wants to be saintly should fulfill the precepts of Avot," is now available here.

* "Nesivos Sholom : Haharugoh Olecha - Essential Perspectives on the Holocaust "
**In Slonim, like in other chassidic communities, the seudah shlishit is an exalted occasion: it is what the Zohar calls the ra'ava d'ravin, the "most favorable of favorable" times for being in presence of the divine.

The Netivot Shalom on the primacy of middot

an excerpt from Netivot Shalom on Pirkei Avot, Ch.1

"...as our Rabbis of blessed memory said in the baraita of Rabbi Pinchas ben Yair, 'Saintliness leads to holy inspiration.' Thus, their words make it clear that putting into practice the teachings of [Pirkei Avot] leads one to prophecy." ...Thus someone who "fulfills the precepts of Avot" attains the highest level a person can reach, that of holy inspiration and prophecy. And the Holy Rabbi Chaiym Vital wrote  to the effect that the Torah does not mention the middot because the Torah was given after the rectification of the middot. The middot themselves are the vehicle by which the Torah is instilled since the Torah can only dwell in a person who has refined his middot...

. . . . . .

The work involved in refining one's middot is harder than the entire Torah. It requires a fundamental change in the cast and character of one's soul, this change being the purpose for which a Jew descends into the world. For example, our sages have said: "Envy, desire and (the pursuit of) honor remove a person from the world." Thus a person who pursues envy, desire or honor excessively needs to change in a fundamental way in order to be able to uproot these pursuits... Indeed, the matter of middot is at such a high level that only someone who has refined and purified his middot can be a vehicle for instilling the Torah."